How do you speak to yourself?
We can notice the judgements, comparisons and expectations that appear in the way you think about yourself.
MEN TALK TOO · SELF-ESTEEM & IDENTITY
Self-esteem & identity counselling for men.
It's possible to be doing everything expected of you and still feel unsure of yourself. Counselling offers time to explore self-doubt, confidence and the question of who you are beyond what you do.
Explore self-esteem counsellingBrighton & HoveIn person near Preston ParkOnline across the UKSessions via Google Meet£65 · 50 minutesFree 15-minute introductory call
Self-worth and identity
When you're not quite sure where you stand with yourself.
You might find yourself second-guessing decisions, comparing yourself with other people or noticing how much your confidence depends on whether something goes well. Perhaps you're capable at work and comfortable around others, yet privately question whether you're doing enough.
There can also be a different sort of uncertainty. The things that once gave your life direction, such as work, relationships, family or a particular role, may no longer feel like they tell the whole story of who you are. You may be wondering what you want, what matters to you or how much of your life has been shaped by other people's expectations.
Low self-esteem and questions about identity aren't identical. They can, however, become closely connected when your sense of worth depends on how you perform, what you achieve or how others see you. You don't need to have an answer to any of this before coming to counselling.
Signs and experiences
How self-doubt and uncertainty can show up.
There is no single way to experience low self-esteem or uncertainty about your identity. Some of these may sound familiar:
Questioning decisions long after you've made them
Feeling that your achievements never quite seem enough
Finding criticism hard to move past, even when it seems minor
Holding back in relationships or social situations
Comparing yourself with others and wondering where you fall short
Feeling unsure what you want beyond your responsibilities or roles
Sometimes self-doubt is obvious. At other times it can sit alongside a life that appears settled and successful. What matters is how you're experiencing it, rather than how it looks from the outside.
How counselling can help01 / Self-perception 02 / Experience 03 / Identity
Looking beyond the version of yourself you feel you have to be.
My approach is humanistic and relational. We can explore the way you see yourself, where those ideas may have come from and how they influence your relationships and choices. There isn't a particular version of confidence or masculinity that I'm trying to steer you towards.
Where did these ideas come from?
Family, relationships, work and past experiences can all influence how we understand our worth. We can explore what's relevant to you.
What feels important now?
We can consider the roles you occupy, the choices you make and what a sense of direction or belonging means in your life.
Counselling isn't about turning you into a more confident character or replacing every doubt with a positive thought. It's an opportunity to understand yourself more fully and consider how you want to relate to yourself and others.
Sessions with MEN TALK TOO
Self-esteem and identity counselling in Brighton & Hove and online.
I offer one-to-one counselling for adult men, whether you're questioning your confidence, navigating a change in life or trying to understand why you feel uncertain about yourself. We can start with whatever feels most relevant to you.
Sessions last 50 minutes and cost £65. I also offer a free 15-minute introductory call if you'd like to ask about my approach before arranging a session.
Frequently asked questions
Questions about self-esteem and identity counselling.
Can counselling help with low self-esteem?
Counselling can give you time to explore how you see yourself, the expectations you live with and the experiences that may have shaped your sense of worth. Greater understanding can sometimes change how you relate to yourself, although everyone's experience of counselling is different.
What's the difference between low confidence and low self-esteem?
Confidence often relates to how capable you feel in a particular situation, while self-esteem concerns your broader sense of worth. You might feel confident in your work and still be very critical of yourself. We can explore how these experiences connect for you.
Can I come to counselling if I don't know who I am or what I want?
Yes. Questions about identity, purpose and direction can be explored in counselling. You don't need to arrive with a clear explanation or a decision to make. We can begin with the uncertainty itself.
Is this counselling only about masculinity?
No. We can talk about expectations of men or masculinity if they're relevant to your experience, alongside relationships, family, work, personal history and anything else that matters to you. I won't assume that gender expectations explain how you feel.
Will you teach me how to be more confident?
My work is humanistic counselling rather than a confidence-training programme or structured CBT course. We focus on understanding your experience, including patterns of self-criticism and the meanings you attach to your choices and relationships.
Do you offer online self-esteem counselling for men?
Yes. I offer online individual counselling via Google Meet across the UK, as well as in-person appointments in Brighton & Hove.
How much does counselling cost?
Sessions are £65 for 50 minutes. You can also arrange a free 15-minute introductory call if you'd like to ask questions first.
Contact MEN TALK TOO
Get in touch.
If you'd like to ask about counselling for self-esteem or identity, availability or how I work, you can send me a message using the form below. I'll reply as soon as I can.
You can also read more about me and MEN TALK TOO.
